Beach Bumming 101

Welcome to your online introductory class on "Beach Bumming". We will use the online syllabus as our text and some various photographs as teaching examples. Questions, comments, and feedback are welcome at the end of our course.

Chapter 1: Timing
When planning your beach day getaway, anticipation is key. Decide with care what time of the day you will be leaving and returning. No need to take heed from the naysayers who will warn you of a 5-6 hour journey from D.C. to Virginia Beach. Clearly they did not see the warning signs of leaving at 3pm on a Friday, going south to the beach. Your best bet will be to wake your sleeping angels up around 6am in order to be on the road by 6:30am, at the latest. With no traffic, it will take you 3 1/2 hours at most. Difficult, but not impossible.

Chapter 2: Gear
If you have children, you will already know that gone are the days of packing a towel, book, and some sunscreen and off you go for a day of sun. No, now it will take you at least a day of gathering all your beach gear, a few more hours of letting your husband figure out just how it will all fit into your little sedan, and then at least another hour the morning of, gathering all the last-minute beach necessities (extra stack of DVD's for the car, one more towel on top of the already-packed dozen, a bottle of bug spray just in case the mosquitoes are out in full force, and at least 2 more blankets for baby to nap on in the already-packed tent). Yes, you read right. You will want to pack a tent if you're planning an all-day excursion. Preferably a Disney princess tent if you have one, just so no one on the beach could possibly miss you. Don't forget the double jogger, beach chairs, cooler, camera bag, food bag, and extra food bag. You may get a few (read: a lot) of looks from people all up and down the beach when you finally arrive, schlepping all your stuff through the hot sand in order to find the perfect spot.

(Proof of the bugs being out in full force.)


Chapter 3: Beach Food
Growing up in my family, near the California beaches, there were certain foods you did not show up to the beach without, namely tuna sandwiches, chips, licorice, nectarines, and Diet Coke. We only added to that near-perfect list with homemade s'mores bars and wasabi peas (a strange, but legitimate favorite snack of Makenna's). Well-chosen beach food can make or break your day. Decide with care.



Chapter 4: Wave Time
Once your children reach a certain age (that age is TBD by you) it is your parental duty to teach them a few things about playing at the beach.
#1 There is a certain reverence to be shown to the all-mighty waves. They can knock you under, knock you down, or knock you sideways in a split second. And in that split second, you will get water up your nose and in your mouth, and you will not like it. This needs to happen to all of us in order to learn this reverence.

#2 There is no convenient bathroom at the beach, other than the obvious one the Almighty created Himself. Once you teach your child it is okay to use it, when to use it, and how to use it (see picture below- a mere demonstration on my part), all will be well.

#3 No matter how careful you are, no matter how many times you flush it out, and no matter how much you "didn't even go swimming in the water," you will always end up with a considerably sized ball of sand at the bottom of your bathing suit. It happens to everyone. Enough said.

(Makenna trying to rid herself of hers.)


#4 If you're lucky, I mean really lucky, the dolphins may put on a show for you and your family as they surf the waves. Have your camera ready.


Chapter 5: Final Thoughts
Last but not least, make sure to pack a camera. Just so that there's no possible way to forget what a perfectly magical day it was with your little family on the big beach, having an enormously fun time together.